Missy Piggy Returns!

Abracadabra!! And the missing Missy Piggy is back!

I've been away for a little while now and partly because of work and partly because.... *Drums rolls....*

Because I have been swept off my feet by a lovely gentleman.

It wasn't love at first sight (I've actually known him for more than 3 years now)
But he certainly caught my attention when I least expected.

So I recently revisited and ranked Mr Ace with Love Hack Matrix.
And he scored at a 90+ percentile and no one has ever... I mean seriously no one EVER came up at such a high score.

Thank you Mr Ace. Thank you for being amazing, charming and intriguing.
Thank you for discovering me and embarking on this journey together.

You are awesome.

Love
Missy Piggy

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What Does He Want? Now What?

So just like most people, getting into a relationship doesn't always mean boom-bam, fireworks, instant butterflies in your stomach and sweeping you off your feet. Sometimes things can be so draggggggyyyyy that you don't even know what stage or what else you should be doing next....

I know Mr T. for must have been around 8 years now. So we started off awkwardly as online friends (we knew each other from Friendster *roll eyes I know*), party friends. He always took good care of me even when I drink myself silly and made sure he sent me back home safely. So over the years we have been in and out of our own relationships but me and Mr T. never got together as a couple despite we did indicate interests towards each other.

Now... This is an interesting situation. We've known each other for a pretty good number of years now. Even though we don't meet up often. We kinda know each other reasonably well by now. (have 1 or 2 kids, travel and be nerdy together) I know I can be in my comfy tee + shorts, messy hair and really just be myself infront of Mr T. He's very geeky and eccentric in his own sense. I kinda find that cute. I remember accompanying Mr T. to shop for fresh towels and toiletries for his then girlfriend who's visiting Singapore and I thought that's really sweet of him.

Sounds like a fairytale in the making so far? Here comes the BUT................

This fella is in a long distance relationship with a Malaysian lady. So he's attached, still indicating interest(?!) and pretty much an arse in my humble opinion. So now what? Drop and ignore him?


Random ramblings.... If it's meant to be, it's meant to be.... I'm not even sure what triggered me to write this article... Perhaps I should stop asking myself and put this into another perspective. Now Mr T., what do you want?

Love
Missy Piggy

PS: A funny article on he's just NOT that into you - http://thoughtcatalog.com/nathan-macintosh/2013/08/8-things-a-guy-does-that-makes-you-think-he-wants-to-be-with-you-but-not-really/

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How to Tell if a Guy is Interested in You?

If you have been following my blog since the beginning, you will have noticed that I have been focusing a lot about me on finding out what I want for myself and how to be a better person in life.

But now hang on a second....! Before we start to evaluate if a guy is potential material (read Love Hack part 1 and part 2), shouldn't we focus on the other party and find out some clues if he is even interested in the first place?

There is this cute guy who reappeared recently and let's call him Mr Law for now. He's slightly younger than me, with a progressive career path and is just very adorable. I find him surprisingly humble given that I have seen so many snorts in his field of profession.

We first met up in a coffee session as he works nearby my office and caught up again over lunch. We shared quite a lot about our experiences in our dates but seems to shy away from anything that's beyond platonic between us.

So I saw his Facebook on his recent travels and managed to catch up again on our recent happenings. We spoke about attending dating events together and being each other "wingman". Then we also joke about escaping the event together if it's boring or if there's no good potentials. Ah... how cute is that?

Let's do a quick Love Hack scoring for Mr Law now...  Ah.... Sweet... I think I'm a bit bias towards Mr Law and he got a decent score of 412. *Me grins* I was also doing a quick read up on articles and articles on finding out clues on how to find out if a guy is interested in you. Oh boy... There are some pretty hardcore and long winded tips out there but I think I will like to zoom down to the major big 3.
  
1. Communication
He will be talking to you a lot! Text messaging, Facebook and even phone calls. Very often if a guy is interested in you, he will be communicating very or fairly frequently. He remembers the tiny details that you briefly mentioned or things that you don't even remember talking about previously. He wants to know you better, he tells you about himself, he compliments you and shares his listening ear when needed.

2. Asking You Out
He will be sourcing for pretty much all kind of opportunities to ask you out and to see you in person. I have a guy friend who even want to tag along for dinner with me and my Mum! This is him wanting to see you to increase his opportunity to get to know you better.

P.S. Mr Law just asked me out for lunch today.

3. Body Language and Behavior
He looks at you a lot, mirrors your body language, give his best attempt in charming you by putting up his best behavior, groom himself (oh no, Mr Law says he's meeting me in his bermudas and singlet today :/), listens to you attentively, display interest in the things you do (even when he know nuts about it) and the most obvious hint will be teasing you in a friendly manner.

I always believe that when a guy is genuinely interested in you, he will be sending off signals that's so strong you can even detect from Mars. So now, the usual skeptical me says Mr Law is probably in his exploration phase and of course there's no harm getting to know one more friend! So relax, have fun and enjoy the time together! (Tomorrow we will be going singing!) You never know!!

Love
Missy Piggy

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36 Thank You Messages For Your Every Day Prince Charming

 Very often we forget to display our gratitude. Here's a note-to-self posting for my future prince charming. :)

 

Though they may be slaying the spider in the bathtub instead of dragons, you know what it means to have found someone who saves you in little ways each day. Even princes need a few reminders that they are appreciated.

1. Thank you for apologizing when I'm too stubborn to do so.
2. Thank you for taking situations that I come to you all frazzled and worked up about, and laying them out for me in this wonderful, logical, guy way that makes everything more clear.
3. Thank you for all of the dorky pictures I make you take with me, and then for not complaining when I post them all over social media for every one of your friends to most likely see.
4. Thank you for bear hugs, forehead kisses, and piggy back rides.
5. Thank you for knowing when to set me straight, and for telling me when you think I'm wrong.
6. Thank you for listening to me and my occasional rants.
7. Thank you for making me laugh when I need it most.
8. Thank you for loving my body the way it is, for never making me feel inadequate, but rather perfect for who I am.
9. Thank you for the little things that you do, like getting the car when it's cold or rainy.
10. Thank you for the moments you make it clear that you are proud of me. Whether it's a big grin after I've done something impressive or the way you present me to others like royalty, it means so much to me.
11. Thank you for every time you have to sit patiently and wait for me to get ready.
12. Thank you for being on my side when it feels like no one else is.
13. Thank you for the times you have went out of your way to do something romantic or sentimental because you knew it would mean the world to me.
14. Thank you also for the times those attempts ended up being more comical than anything for the both of us. The fact that you try is romantic enough, and if I ended the night laughing with you, it was a perfect one regardless.
15. Thank you for making me feel safe.
16. Thank you for vocalizing your opinions to me, and not being afraid to disagree.
17. Thank you for taking time to learn about and experience the things that I enjoy.
18. Thank you for being responsible and hardworking day in and day out.
19. Thank you for earning my trust and never misusing it.
20. Thank you for supporting me and my dreams, and never trying to hold me back from what I want in life.
21. Thank you for your patience on my moody days.
22. Thank you for knowing what's upsetting me before I even have to say anything.
23. Thank you for every time you had to venture into the foreign world of a jewelry store or women's clothing store to try to hunt down a gift for me.
24. Thank you for wanting to experience new things together and for expanding my horizons.
25. Thank you for the wonderful time we spend with our families.
26. Thank you for sitting through countless chick flicks and girl dramas.
27. Thank you for being my number one confidant. You are my ultimate secret keeper.
28. Thank you for trusting me.
29. Thank you for the little ways that you help me every day. Even the most minor of tasks or chores done just for the sake of helping me do not go unnoticed.
30. Thank you treating me respectfully at all times.
31. Thank you for all of the lazy days we spend just being best friends. Snacks, Netflix, and cuddling with you are ingredients to some of my favorite days.
32. Thank you for being vulnerable and open to me. I know as a man that can be very difficult to do, but it's developed a closeness that I value each moment I spend with you.
33. Thank you for being the one that sometimes gets the backlash of the harm that others cause. I know when I have a rough day; you often have to deal with my crankiness. For that, you are a saint.
34. Thank you for that look in your eyes that reminds me that I am yours. It reminds me of my connection with you, and that through it all, you really and truly see me.
35. Thank you for being the kind of man who does all of these things without a second thought. Thank you for being a man who doesn't require any kind of praise or gratitude for being a caring and trustworthy best friend to me.
36. Thank you for knowing that even if I don't always say it, I'm incredibly grateful for my handsome prince. Because with that big smile and heart of gold, you take down all of life's witches and dragons.

Follow Lexi Herrick on Twitter: www.twitter.com/lexi_herrick

Reposted from source

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Love Hack - How I Hack My Way Into Finding Love (Part 2)

 

 
In Love Hack Part 2, it is now the time to do some ranking out of the list of 50 traits of What are you looking for in a mate.

First step will involve ranking them to three different categories:

• Mandatory - Die die must have (10 points)
• Essential - Good to have (5 points)
• Negligible - Don't have also ok(1 points)

After my first attempt in ranking the 50 traits, I realized I have placed a whole chunk of  29 characteristics into the first mandatory category. Oh boy, I am demanding I thought to myself.

So to be more realistic, another category "deal breaker" will help to determine the first and most important benchmark. This category will have the most points (50 points) and will certainly make or break the possibilities of a potential date.

Version 1 now looks like this:

Right click, view image or click here to see full table.

The total possible score is 805. With a mean score of 402.5, I think the average score 400 serves as a good benchmark to qualifies as a potential. Of course the spreadsheet can be revisited when you get to know the person better overtime.

Let's proceed with some sample checks.

Mr Geek is an ex colleague and friend for years now. He semi unwillingly surrender himself as my first guinea pig. Has a sense of humor checked, respectful checked, honesty checked. Final score of 301. Hmm, as a platonic friend, I think that result is fairly reasonable.

Mr NYPD, actually someone I knew from LAX airport when I was transiting to Houston. We still kept in touch till now but he is physically FAR FAR AWAY from Singapore. Based on my understanding, he is positive, confident, passionate, improves his physical health, knows the importance of family. Final score: 434. Should I deduct score because he is not physically in the same country as me and I don't see ourselves being in the same country anytime soon? Oh well, he's cute. :P

Mr Green. I've actually known Mr Green for more than 8 years now. We don't meet very often but we did express interest to each other back then. Surprisingly his score is only around 367. Maybe, the numbers do speak some truth.

Mr Southie has been a friend for at least 3 years? He is currently not physically in Singapore as he travels a lot for work. Another surprise that he scored 416 which is above the mean score. Do I see myself being with him? I actually don't think so. Note to self, a pinch of salt here.

Mr Classmate for the final testing and to make sure the system works alright. And fair enough, his final score is around 323.

I've known most peers in this sample test for at least couple of years. So I don't really know how well the Love Hack Score Matrix will help me in translating scores for new friends. But I think a few tweaks along the way is inevitable.

Just in time for this dating event I am going to attend this Saturday!

Love
Missy Piggy

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Love Hack - How I Hack My Way Into Finding Love (Part 1)

At this point of this posting, nope, I have yet to find love.
But am I confident that I will find love one day? Hell yes!!!

So we have been reading TONS of relationship related articles, heard endless advices from married peers and nagging mums. How exactly do we find love for ourselves?!!! I don't know the answer for each and every individual but I think most of us fail to find love because we are not doing anything much apart from leaving the chance of our relationship in the hands of fate.

NOW I am not going to sit on my arse and wait for love to find me, I am going to give it an attempt to hack my way into love.

The two major points are:

1) Identify what I was looking for in a mate.
2) Develop my own algorithm and rules for love.

As you can sense by now, my thoughts about finding love has a lot to do with self awareness, defining yourself and identifying what you want. You have already won half the battle if you can list down in specifics, the traits you are looking for in a partner and give your best shot in trying to stick with your list (of course the list can be updated along the way)

So in the first part of my article, here's my list off the top of my head. Of course the guy doesn't have to meet all of them and some points might be a bit silly -

What are you looking for in a mate (in no particular order)

1. He is honest
2. He is positive
3. Committed and faithful
4. He is confident
5. He understands and enjoys food. (live to eat, not eat to live)
6. He cooks
7. He is a traveler and has traveled to at least 3 continents
8. Has a sense of humor
9. He has true and close friendships
10. He improves his physical health
11. He knows the importance of family
12. Balanced in life (life is not just about work work and work)
13. He knows how to take care of himself
14. He has a good and progressive career
15. He weighs at least 10kg more than me at all times.
16. He is interested in scuba diving
17. He has temperance (moderate in action, thought, feeling and yup alcohol. Thinks before he acts)
18. He wants to have his own family and wants kids
19. He is intelligent and would challenge and stimulate me
20. He understands the importance of personal space
21. He listens
22. He is respectful (to family, friends and strangers)
23. He is financially savvy (knows how to take care of his money and budgeting)
24. He is curious and adventurous about life
25. He’s humble
26. He knows how to occasionally let his hair down and enjoy life
27. He is generous (not just monetary but also sharing his life and heart with his love ones)
28. He has gratitude
29. He seeks peace
30. He provide guidance 
31. He's driven 
32. He's a good communicator
33. He's a protector. He is able to and wants to take care of you
34. He is in the same location (or has plans to be)
35. He is sensitive enough to your emotions and acknowledges them.
36. He is trustworthy
37. He practices humility. (It’s much more admirable to find a man who can admit his wrongdoings, which in the end prevents plenty of arguments.) 
38. He is down to Earth
39. He is responsible
40. He loves me for who I am, the way I am
41. He will spend time with me
42. He will encourage me
43. He is proud of my accomplishments
44. He will build me up and not tear me down
45. He will make me feel secure and loved
46. He doesn’t make me worry or fearful
47. He is romantic
48. He is passionate
49. He is not too clingy
50. He is mature

Long list I know!!

In the second part of my article, I will be prioritizing the list and ranking everything with a scoring system. There will of course be some deal breakers because certain things are quite important to me and I think it is critical to share some common traits for a relationship in a longer run.

I will then figure out a minimum score before I will agree to go out on a date or a different score to rank if the guy is a keeper.

This is a lot about me, me and me I know. But this is also an important exercise to find out a rough guide of what Missy Piggy looks for in a man.

Stay tune for part 2!

Love
Missy Piggy

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Why Am I Single?

Yes... The gazillion dollar question. In this journey to seek for love, I have repeatedly asked myself many many times....... "Missy Piggy, why are you still single?"

I am comfortable being single and honestly quite enjoy doing my own stuff sometimes. Like most girls, I don't think I have any lack of attention but somehow the number of compatible potentials are sometimes equivalent to a golden egg.

Curious by nature (and somewhat analytical), I figured that I should gather some feedback from a few close friends and adopt a different view from another perspective. And so I decided to create a simple questionnaire and send it out to some close friends and hopefully get some valuable insights from the results.

But what should I be asking?

Off the top of my head, I can think of 3 main questions:

1) From a rating of 1 to 5, please rate Missy Piggy on the following criteria:

• Attractiveness
• Intelligence
• Talent
• Confidence
• Spontaneity
• Sensuality
• Independence
• Supportive
• Humor
• Temperament

2)Why do you think Missy Piggy is single?

3)What can increase the chances of Missy Piggy finding someone?

Hohoho... This is getting interesting and there will be some great truth or dare moments.

Getting on SurveyMonkey now! Stay tuned for the final results!!!

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Who Am I?

Memoirs of Missy Piggy

Ok, not exact a memoir but a quick introduction of myself. I will like to share a bit of my own profile so that some like-minded readers can follow my journey closely and share with me your views too.

As you can derive from my nick, I am born in the year of pig and 31 this year at the point of this post.

A working professional by day and inspiring wonder woman by night. I have a desk bound career as an analyst and a decent income that fuels my wide range of hobbies. That said, I have been told that I am not your typical Singapore woman. Why? I am independent, I know mostly what I want in life and steering towards my goals with clear milestones. I am adventurous, spontaneous, know how to put food on the table, decent fashion sense, articulate well and try to live life to the fullest.

I do solo travelings, indulge in local delicacies and fine dining. I also spend time picking up creative hobbies that balances my pretty dry but exciting career.

I have been told that I am above average in terms of looks. I am happy to brand myself as a well traveled Singapore Chinese who has a global mindset and values my own traditional roots.

In short, I am actually not too bad!

I can almost hear you screaming out your question on why am I still single?

What Have I Done?

Yes I have been keeping myself busy with work, self development activities and life. I am a very blessed lady and have been dating around but have yet to find someone to settle down with.

I do not enjoy clubbing since young. I dislike crowds, so clubbing and most night spots will be out for me.

Most of my peers have either settled down or inspiring sworn bachelor/bachelorette. A few good souls have attempted on introducing their friends to me and we ended up being great pals ourselves. So it rather seems like conventional channels are pretty much a dead end for me now.

I am technology trained so for the past few years, I have adopted a few online/mobile platforms to get to know new friends.

Online + Mobile Dating
In a nutshell, I enjoy the convenience of  online dating but find it challenging to shortlist the really good few potentials as you will usually be swarm by high volume of interactions. A lot of interactions sounds good isn't it? But it also equates to high level of effort required to maintain the communication going. The dating cycle usually involve exchange of messages, meeting up for coffee or meals and following up. It is actually quite taxing if you multiples it by a few potentials. Plus sometimes the guys you meet in person might have a very different offline personality and you will have to restart the knowing-the-person cycle again face to face.

Feedback
Convenience Level: High
Cost: Minimal
Maintenance: High

Of course there has been many successful cases and raves about the good points of online dating. I had my fair share of it and now keen to explore other dating platforms.

What Am I Looking For?

So what kind of traits am I searching for in my future partner?

I only have one key word: Compatibility

I do not believe in getting fixated on cold hard expectations on how my future partner should be but I have a few golden rules that I often refer to myself.

The five critical questions you must ask yourself if you are serious about finding and keeping a life partner: 

Question 1: Do we share a common life purpose?

Question 2: Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?

Question 3: Is he a mensch?

Question 4: How does he/she treat other people?

Question 5: Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're married?

I will be sharing this article in my next posting so stay tuned.

Summing up this articlewith a question I get quite often: "Missy Piggy, are you just being picky??"

I do think everyone deserves the right to be reasonably picky for our own future is in our own hands. I evaluate myself from time to time and has mature over the years. So I do not think I am unrealistic and I believe in finding the right one than to settle for just anyone.

Not exactly a short introduction but I hope you will enjoy my blog as I try my very best to document my journey to find my special someone!

Love
Missy Piggy

P.S:  I felt like Jean Valjean when I picked the title for this post!

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